’Tis the season … for stressing, overspending, overindulging, and stretching oneself too thinly.
It’s far too easy to compare one’s approach to the overall Holiday season (you know, the one that pretty much runs from Thanksgiving through to New Year, and maybe even beyond) with that of other family, friends, neighbors, and TV commercials. Resist the urge to do so, please!
In my college years and after, I often found myself being “adopted” by friends and even strangers for a Christmas Eve or Christmas celebration. And I’ve seen a lot.
One year, a coworker invited me to their family Christmas Eve celebration at their home in Duluth. Large Italian family with lots of people, and especially lots of kids (compared with our smaller family). Big meal with way too much food. And then, a knock on the door. Here was Santa at the door, with maybe five or six big trash bags filled with gifts for the kids (and not the kitchen size). It probably took more than half an hour to distribute all those gifts, and each kid got 10 or more from those seemingly endless trash bags. That was my first taste of “Christmas excess,” as fun as it was. The family had left the bags of toys outside for Santa to bring in (in case you want to replicate it some day).
Another Christmas I was invited to join the Loving family (actually their name). After a spectacular dinner with their finest china and stemware, they exchanged gifts. Small family with two adult daughters, they really focused on the presentation of their presents: each gift was wrapped and decorated as a true work of art. It was almost a shame to tear them open, even if it was done carefully.
One of my favorite Thanks-givings was when I lived in D.C. There were a few of us “strays” who didn’t have any place else to go for Thanksgiving. The apartment building manager invited us to her apartment for a pot-luck dinner. She baked a turkey (complete with the giblets bag still inside). All I had to offer was leftover pizza, and Jell-O. Everyone brought what they could, with no pretenses, and it was more fun because no one had to fuss over the dinner setting (paper plates) or the food. The focus was on the fellowship.
To be honest, our family has become quite adept at resisting the urge: to overspend, purchasing too many gifts for less-than-appreciative recipients. The TV commercials beckon to spend, spend, spend (and charge, charge, charge). So much is about impressing others, people who won’t remember and don’t care.
What are some of your warmest, favorite Christmas memories? They’re probably not the extravagant ones. Mine? Making tree ornaments with my mom from construction paper, glue, and glitter. Making hundreds of Christmas cookies then freezing them in hopes they last the season. Traveling to grandma’s house up north. The makeshift celebrations with friends and strangers as a “Christmas orphan.” I do remember both gifts I’ve given and received (because my brain works like a filing cabinet), but none of them are particularly warm or favorite memories.
So I beg you, this Christmas season, to pay no heed to the commercial side of it all. Focus on the family, the fun, the free parts of the Holiday. That’s where the best memories are made.
Meanwhile, remember to SHOP LOCAL as much as possible. No, you can’t find everything you want locally, but you can still SUPPORT LOCAL. Like their posts on Facebook, and share them. Refer your friends to local businesses when they need those services. Share your positive experiences with local businesses. Thank business owners and employees for providing their services, when you see them in public, and ask how things are going. None of these things cost a penny, but can spread goodwill and good spirits.
And please, literally for the love of God, BE KIND.